Yowazzup: A Directory of Happening Things

Paris Hilton was one of the judge in the Miss Turkey contest. One of the contestants brought Paris onstage to do some belly dancing. D’oh, Paris doesn’t even have a belly to dance!

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Paris Hilton is showing off her love for new beau Benji Madden at the Las Vegas opening of the Kim Vo Salon Friday night.

Paris Hilton was seen out wearing a large ring on her left ring finger with the initials “BM,” which was thought to be for her new boyfriend, Benji Madden. There is of course speculation that she’s engaged.

The following night, the heiress, 27, helped the Good Charlotte guitarist celebrate his 29th birthday at LAX nightclub, where she surprised him with a cake.

Paris Hilton and Benji Madden made their relationship public on February 21, smooching at Hollywood hot spot Villa.

Will their relationship last?

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Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie may be BFFs and now after Nicole Richie has given birth to a baby girl with boyfriend, Joel Madden, Paris too want to have a Madden as a boyfriend. Paris has gone public with her newest boyfriend, Good Charlotte rocker Benji Madden.

Paris Hilton and Benji Madden were spotted shopping together

Will someday both Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie marry their respective Madden’s and make a new season of The Simple Life with Madden’s? Who knows?

Benji Madden and former fiancee Sophia Monk

One thing puzzling is why would Benji Madden dump Sophie Monk for Paris Hilton?

In a twist on “the blonde leading the blonde”, Monk once parodied Hilton in her big screen breakthrough flick, Date Movie, playing up the super spruiker’s raunchy advert for a burger chain in 2005.

But Hilton can now have the last laugh as she’s now got her teeth into Monk’s former man.

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If you love Paris Hilton, maybe you shouldn’t miss out “The Hottie and The Nottie”, starring Paris Hilton, of course, and a bunch of fugly people.

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Let’s have a look at Mad Magazine’s 20 Dumbest People, Events & Things in 2007: -

Number 20

Sanjaya, the “American Idol” contestant who “made William Hung sound like Josh Groban.”

Number 19

Tainted pet food.

Number 18

Toe-tapping Idaho Sen. Larry Craig, whose “wide stance” explanation following his arrest for lewd conduct in an airport men’s room instantly entered the comedy pantheon for “All-Time Lamest Excuse.”

Number 17

Alberto Gonzales “The Nation’s Chief Flawed Officer” — and before the American Bar Association named the disgraced attorney general “Lawyer of the Year,” no less.

Number 16

Lindsay Lohan. You’ve got to hand it to her for managing to cram an entire career’s worth of mistakes into just a few scant years.”

Number 15

“If I Did It,” by O.J. Simpson.

Number 14

The Creation Museum in Petersburg, Ky.

Number 13

“The Sopranos” for its “ungrand un-finale.”

Number 12

Convicted Scooter Libby, “A Man For All Treasons.”

Number 11

Keith Richards, for reportedly snorting his dad’s ashes with coke.

Number 10

“Isaiah Washington Bashes Homosexuals.” Another celeb whose bigoted words cost him his job, surpassing “frigid, right-wing hatemonger Ann Coulter” and NBA’s Tim Hardaway “for sheer stupidity and intolerance.”

Number 9

“The Giant Toy Recall — A China Pattern,” features such surefire stocking-stuffers as “Poison Me Elmo,” “Thomas the Tainted Engine” and the “Easy Burn Oven.”

Number 8

“The Crazy Diapered Astronaut,”Lisa Marie Nowak, or “Houston, We Have a Mental Problem” — tastefully illustrated with a box of Unrequited Luvs” diapers.

Number 7

Paris Hilton, “The Ultimate Dumb Blonde Joke.” “Amazingly, her jail sentence wasn’t punishment for her career (even though her CD arguably warranted the death penalty).”

Number 6

The Anna Nicole Smith Paternity Trial. You remember, that revolting, distasteful spectacle everyone hated, that occupied countless hours of broadcast news time. “There was a dead blonde, so odds were good O.J. had some involvement.”

Number 5

The Walter Reed Army Hospital Scandal took No. 5, illustrated with a “G.I. Woe — Forgotten Warrior” action figure, sporting an amputated leg.

Number 4

No. 4 was a gift that keeps on giving: Britney Spears. Noting that 2007 was “a real show-stopper” even by her standards, Mad quips, “Leave it to Britney to lose her babies before losing her baby weight.”

Number 3

Radio host Don Imus was No. 3 for the “nappy-headed hos” remark that “cost the wrinkled old geezer his job.”

Number 2

George W. Bush took second place by breaking the presidential record for time off — with a year left in his term. “If FDR took off that much time … you’d be reading this introduction in German while munching on strudel.”

Number 1

Fighting his way to the No. 1 spot is Michael Vick, whom Mad’s “usual gang of idiots” calls “the most hated man in America.” The Falcons quarterback was sentenced to 23 months for running a dogfighting kennel where he drowned and electrocuted losing dogs. “Too bad the NFL doesn’t have a similar policy for losing quarterbacks,” Mad opines.

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Paris Hilton was on David Letterman Show on September 28, 2007. Watch how David Letterman destroys Paris bit by bit. Really hilarious!

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Good evening. Bad news ahead.

• Apparently, TMZ confirmed that Paris is not locked out of hotel fortune. The earlier report was false.
• These days, actors like to go to jail. After Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie, Sanjay Dutt did Bollywood proud as he goes to jail for six years.

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Good morning, world!

• Most of us by now would have known that Paris Hilton loses her inheritance. Apparently, grandpa Hilton is appalled by her jail term for drink-driving offence.
• The Simpsons Movie top box office. No doubt it’s clear winner.
• Good news, coffee junkie and gym freaks! Coffee and exercise can fight skin cancer!

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Hello, world!

At first, you heard, “I don’t mind spending some time. Just hanging here with you in the jail.

Later, you get to hear, “Even though the gods are I am crazy (Oh)… Even though the stars are judge is blind (Oh)… Even though the gods are I am crazy (Oh)… Even though the stars are judge is blind (Oh)… Repeat till get out of jail.”

Paris Hilton is definitely going crazy.

In other news:

• Nadal destroys Federer in French Open Final.
• Finally, Bill Gates gets his degree after dropping out of the college 33 years ago.

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Surprise, surprise!

Paris Hilton has been fitted for ankle bracelet and reassigned to house arrest, after authorities decided to release Hilton from jail due to medical reasons, this according to Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Dept. spokesperson, Steve Whitmore.

Reporters hammered away about Paris’ medical condition during a press conference in front of the jail where she was released early this morning, but Whitmore said he could not discuss even the slightest health-related details due to confidentiality laws.

Paris will be under house confinement in her West Hollywood home for 40 days, where she has a 3000-4000 ft. radius of freedom. Her jail cell was 96 square feet. After the 40 days are up, Whitmore says she will have “fulfilled her debt to society.”

Whitmore wants to make it clear that Paris was not released early, she was reassigned. She is technically still in custody.

Why I am not surprised at all?

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